One of my new favourite violinists, Janine Jansen, playing the Mendelssohn violin concerto. *Insert contented sigh here*
I Heart Khachaturian July 31, 2010
I’ve tried to choose something else for my audition preparation, but I keep coming back to this one. It’s apparently not a “good audition piece,” but I say, who cares?!? I think its the way that I’ll play it that will win me an audition. I hope. Eventually.
Good, Bad, and Ugly February 16, 2010
Good
I just had a great lesson. I understand spiccato bowing now, and apparently I was already good at it, and I understand how to have strength in my sound while having a good bow path! For those non-string players, these are good things!
Bad
I still haven’t found a new violin, nor have I sold my current violin. Sigh. I think I will have to go back to that one shop and see if they still have the french violin that I really liked…
Ugly
No motivation! I know it’s part of the depression, but I feel kinda lazy. I never feel like doing much, and it is hard to make myself practice. I have just one short month or so until my next recital, and I NEED to get my butt in gear. I trying to give myself very specific, daily goals to achieve this, but it’s not always going well… I am going to set up some practicing dates with friends, but other than that, do you have any suggestions to help me get off my butt?
New Rep :) December 6, 2009
I’m choosing my new repertoire. So far, I’ve got Beethoven’s 3rd sonata to satisfy my classical requirements for my next recital, and for the rest I’m going modern. Here’s the first movement of one of the possibilities. So fun!!
Recital #1 – Check December 2, 2009
Grad recital number one is done! I have been relaxing ever since… Until now, that is, since I’m in a really useless seminar class at the moment… I feel great about my recital. Here’s the rundown:
Poeme Elegiaque, Ysaye
- Sadly, out of tune. Much more so than the studio recital the other day..
- Tempo’s were good
- There were really effective and affective moments throughout, which is good!
Sonata No. 1 for solo violin, Bach
- Awesome!
- No memory problems, so take that, you-know-who who wanted me to use music!
- I knew I had a successful performance, when just before I bowed, I noticed that one of my jurors was clapping with his hands over his head!! I was (and still am) very happy about that!
Suite Italienne, Stravinsky
- Went smoothly, for the most part
- I wasn’t as tired as I expected by this point, and my G-string managed to stay in tune throughout the piece. It had been going flat because of the scordatura (tuning my G to an F) in the Ysaye.
- Again, very happy with the performance!
I even held it together the whole night. Since going through depression, I am an emotional mess whether something is good or bad. I was (and still am) overwhelmed that I have made it to this point in my degree, and really thought I’d break down and cry as soon as I finished. I will admit, when my two jurors came back to congratulate me, some of their words had me choking up a bit, but I did not shed a tear. Seems a little trivial, but I am happy about that. I am happy to be this emotional about it, but would rather it was in private. These people think I’m crazy enough as it is! 
Since my recital, I have had a bit of an issue with my teacher. Another one. Uugh. She did not mention A WORD about my recital my entire lesson, until I brought it up at the very end. More about this in a minute. We spent the majority of the lesson talking (at my insistence) a out making future plans. She did not seem optimistic about my chances for getting into the DMA/Artist Diploma degrees that I was interested in, nor was she optimistic about me landing a decent orchestral or teaching position. She seemed to be dancing around it, but did not want to come right out and say it. She hinted that I should teach beginners Suzuki violin (which I did previously, before returning to do my Masters degree), and not pursue anything greater. Don’t get me wrong, I think teaching children is an EXTREMELY important job and I do enjoy it, but I do think that I am capable of teaching at a higher level and performing if I so choose.
Back to her recital feedback… I brought it up at the very end of my “lesson” asking for her thoughts so that I can improve for my next recital. She said: “what do you think?” and then just said “I agree” when I said ONE THING I’d like improve on. Uugh. She cannot ruin my good mood! I have succeeded, whether she thinks so or not!! I think I might send her an email to clear the air and try to straighten things out…. We’ll see…
T – 2 days November 25, 2009
Two days from now at this time, I will be warming up for my first grad recital. I have gone through a range of emotions this week preparing, and am finally content with my preparedness. Last night I played the Ysaye in a studio recital, and was fairly happy with the performance, and today I had my dress rehearsal in the theater. I was mostly pleased, though I did have some memory slips in the Bach which I did not recover well from. I will play it for some friends tomorrow and possibly Friday morning, and I’m sure by Friday night I’ll have it. I can’t wait until it’s done! To celebrate, we have champagne at home (left over from my birthday), and on Saturday we’re decorating the house and putting up the Christmas lights. Woo-hoo!!! I love Christmas time 
If you’re curious, check out my programme. I love the pieces I’m performing:
E. Ysaye – Poeme Elegiaque
J.S. Bach – Sonata No. 1 for Solo violin
I. Stravinsky (arr. by Dushkin) – Suite Italienne for Violin and Piano
Quickie November 10, 2009
Heehee
A little post for the day! Last week was my birthday, though I had a busy, busy day for my birthday. It started with a doctors appointment (ugh), then practicing, then a lesson, then practicing, then teaching a lesson, then work. No time to celebrate! I did treat myself to a lovely latte & pumpkin scone though My favorite. Saturday night a few lovely friends and I went out for dessert to celebrate, which was fun.
I am a practice machine! My recital is soon… I’m worried… But it WILL be great. I just have to keep practicing more than I want to! Speaking of which… I have an hour free so that’s what I’m going to do.
Good, good, good news! October 14, 2009
I am finally ready to share my good news with you, and no mum, I’m not pregnant! Hahaha! Actually, I have had a run of good luck lately, but the biggest news is that I am now on faculty at the school I’m currently finishing my Masters degree at. I officially signed the contract this morning, though it has been in the works for a couple of weeks. I’m starting with just one student, but it will be a great test to see if university level teaching is an avenue I’d like to pursue. Up to this point in my life, I’ve been heading toward a career as an orchestral musician while teaching younger students on the side because so far, that is what I love doing. With this opportunity, I will have the chance to see if I will enjoy teaching at a higher level. Anyhow, I am THRILLED at this opportunity and what it will mean for my resume!
I must admit, I was TERRIFIED to tell my own teacher about this. She is a wonderful teacher and has been extremely supportive of me through my struggles with depression this past year, however, she is quite particular about the order of things in her studio (to say the least!). I dreaded the moment of telling her from the time I was first asked to take this on. Turns out that I shouldn’t have… When I “broke the news” to her, she simply said “yeah, I know.” Then she told me that she was the one that recommended me for the job. All of a sudden my troubles in lessons disappeared. I finally understood that no, she doesn’t think I suck, she just RARELY gives out compliments; well, in my mind this is the biggest compliment I could ever be given. A year and a half of breaking down in lessons is OVER! I’ve always understood that lessons are meant to help me improve, and that of course I have an immense amount to learn and many more skills to refine, but I now know that I’m not playing “catch-up” to where I should be. I work hard, I am skilled, and I am dedicated to the continual improvement of my playing and musical understanding. Aaaaah, what a good feeling! I don’t think I have ever been this content before. It’s lasted for a week so far, and I will do my best to ensure that it continues.
